The only reason I use, “Granola Girl,” is because on my last day in Texas, my friends tagged my car, “Boulder Bound Granola Girl.” I felt it appropriate.
Today, I am sitting in my new room, in a new home, with newness all around me. There are no pictures, posters, or maps on my wall (yet), like I had at my home in Texas. I have not yet made this space my own.
I’m still figuring out who I am in this new chapter.
Thursday morning, I packed my Mazda to the brim, and my two cats hit the road. I arrived in Boulder, CO 14 hours later.
Even though I had been planning and preparing for over a month to move, nothing could have prepared me for the emotional implosion within my heart and soul as I drove away from my little house in Fort Worth, TX. My entire world collapsed.
I left behind friends, family, and my boyfriend of almost three years, Peter.
I don’t think I’ve ever done anything more difficult in my life. I cried most of the drive to Boulder; not just whiney crying either – sobbing, weeping, tears that were sourced from somewhere deep inside my heart. Mostly, for Peter. I left him for the mountains, but no mountain can compare to him. He is my best friend and while this is extremely hard for both of us, he supports me.
Many of our friends asked if we are going to stay together – yes! The distance is definitely going to be a whole new flavor, but all I can think about is how incredibly strong it will make us. Our relationship is going to grow from this.
Do I think I could be wrong? Of course, but I am not thinking about the future. I have now, so I can only think about now. Thinking about the future only creates problems and worry.
“The Future is, of all things, the thing least like eternity. It is the most temporal part of time–for the Past is frozen and no longer flows, and the Present is all lit up with eternal rays.” – C.S. Lewis
Oh, by the way, Boulder could be Narnia. I went up into the mountains yesterday and this is what I found:
Thanks to everyone who encourages me, inspires me, and supports me.
I wouldn’t be here without support from people I know and people I don’t know. You never know what kind of inspiration you are going to be to someone.